a huge hangover, and a broken heart

yesterday was a busy day.

good -
[1] my fren, Zeyenn accompany me for lunch, then agreed to go Boat Quay and drink with me. *i really need the dosage of alcohol*
[2] i went for a Samsung audition for their IT Show and got the job. Hooray! *i see money rolling in~!*
[3] i finally move my ass, went to sch library and borrowed the textbook required for Tues paper *yes, i am tat last min*

bad -
[1] Zeyenn and I opened a bottle of Chivas @ Plush Room*sinful indulgence coz i wanna get drunk*
[2] i drink myself silly... again. (on an empty stomach somemore) *it's nothing new to me le. it has always been my way of escape*
[3] i met my fren, Chiron at Starlight, supposingly to drink somemore, but troubled him to send me back within 20min of reaching. *i think the seat not even warm yet*
[4] i called her, and make a fool outta myself by sobbing. met up and sob some more. *till nw, i still can't believe i did tat*
[5] i request to meet him in my drunken state *which is lame, coz he'll think i did it on purpose to make him feel bad?*
[6] i allowed myself to totally knock out at his place, coz i juz dun wanna control myself anymore. *i'm so disappointed in myself...*

i dunno why i wanna drink. It's juz dumb right? but it's always been my form of escape from my problems. cry, not eating, late nights out, not sleeping, way too much drinking etc... typical things pple do when they can't deal with stress. these days, i seldom cry though. even if not for my r/s problems, there's still my exams stress... i miss the days where i go club between papers to release the pent-up stress.


now i'm home, nursing a huge hangover, and a broken heart. sigh~ the stupidity of me...